Ella's story transcript

Ella: I remember the day. We’d just had a massive fight and the kids were there, and I just decided I can’t live like this. I can’t have my kids living like this. I’m showing my kids, my daughter, it’s okay to be treated like this. So I just left.

It was just emotional abuse. I was getting put down all the time. It went on for years and I just didn’t want to feel that way any more. I was embarrassed and ashamed. It wasn’t an easy decision at all.

Jenna: If you look at the hierarchy of needs, shelter is right up there. Housing is everything, particularly to women who have had the uncertainty and trauma of living in domestic and family violence.

Ella: I was financially dependent on my partner. I had no skills, I had no job, I had no qualifications. I had nothing but the clothes on my back. I was afraid I’d  become homeless with three children and then my kids would get taken away from me.

Jenna: Liberty Domestic and Family Violence Specialist Services offers a holistic approach to domestic and family violence. We are also a specialist housing support service.

When she finally decided to leave the relationship, Ella found it difficult to identify what it was that she wanted from her future and she felt unworthy of exploring her hopes, goals and dreams. She could really only see that she needed a roof over her head and her children’s heads.

Ella: I got so much support from everyone at Liberty Services. They put me into a transitional house and helped with my kids’ daycare. I got it for free for 12 months so I could study and find my feet.

Jenna: Because of her study she was actually extended in the transitional housing program because we could see where her education was taking her. We offered her narrative therapy, in which you don’t define the person by the problem that they walk in with and this tended to be behind the success of Ella.

Her children were able to come to Kids Club, our program based on resilience building and children understanding that domestic violence is not their responsibility.

Ella successfully completed her course and entered the workforce, which meant that Community Housing Limited offered her a property under the National Rental Affordability Scheme.

Ella: When I got my first paycheck I was just so happy. I didn’t have to depend on anyone anymore.

I can now afford to pay my full rent on my own. Now I have my own money. I have my own house. I have my own car. If the kids want something, I can just buy it for them. I have everything and it’s because of me.

Having a house makes me feel safe and stable. It’s my home, it’s my kids’ home and I don’t have to answer to anyone.

Jenna: There was a whole person who was ready to break out of that situation and have it not define her and ready to move forward and take back her power, which she very much has.

To know that you have played a small part in that journey and the privilege of walking beside women through that journey, it’s why we do what we do. It’s what we live and breathe.

Ella: I’m so proud of myself. I’ve learned that I am a strong, independent woman that my kids can look up to and admire. I want women to know that life can be better and you can do it on your own. I’m an example of that.

Return to All Because of Me.